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PHQ | QUESTIONS FROM COMMUNITY: In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about how introverts can develop their extraverted co-pilot process without getting overwhelmed.

 

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Showing 8 comments
  • CrystalOak
    Reply

    Hi… I’ve listened to the podcast and I love it, but I have a couple of questions.

    I’m INFJ and it seems like you skipped over us in your examples. Can you give some examples on how I recharge using my introverted intuition?

    Also, would spending time on fb support groups, offering healing and running spiritual groups be a good used of my copilot? Am I right in thinking if I am not so great at self care that would also be included?

    Loved the podcast, just trying to work out, with my still limited understanding, how to apply it to my life.

    Keep up the awesome work
    xx

  • Charis Branson
    Reply

    Hi CrystalOak! Thanks for your comment. The best way for an Ni user to recharge is through meditation and quiet times of contemplation. Journaling is good. Quiet walks in nature. Make sure you are getting uninterrupted alone time to allow your mind to drift.

    In my experience, you can’t exercise your Harmony copilot virtually. You need to be able to interact with people’s energies and see and feel the benefits you are bringing to them. Virtual Harmony is pretty thankless and there is going to be more of a drain on your energies as you give and give and give and rarely receive the kind of positive feedback that is so necessary to INFJs.

    We need to know we are helping people. Someone typing out “Thanks!” in a Facebook group and sending a happy face emoticon doesn’t feed our need to feel the difference we are making. I stay away from most Facebook groups because I find they are extremely disruptive to my mental and emotional state.

    But that’s just my experience. How do you feel after spending a lot of time on FB? Do you feel intense love for the people you meet there? Or do you feel negative and drained? Ultimately, the path you choose for growth is up to you.

    • CrystalOak
      Reply

      Thanks for your reply, I appreciate that.

      I do love to allow my mind to wander and one of the best weekend days is for me to have the house to myself (my cats don’t count) and just “potter”, do the housework as I feel like doing it, take time to stand in the garden and look at my flowers, and just be. So that’s great that I am doing that.

      I can also see what you are saying about online support groups. I used to offer face to face healing and ran a meditation group but my day job was draining me so much I didn’t have the energy to give to people in that environment. I gave up promoting my healing and cancelled my meditation group, and I must admit, I do feel pretty lost now. So I need to find a way to do that more. I’m guessing more of the “pottering” is needed somehow to recharge me enough to do the healing work.

      In online groups where relationships are formed I do find I get enough feedback, and I enjoy blogging too, but I kind of kid myself that someone is reading it. Some groups really fire me up, some wear me out. I tend to leave the latter pretty fast.

      Thank you for your insight, this has given me something to think about.
      Have a great day!

    • L
      Reply

      This is a really great podcast like all the other content i have been binging on for the past 2 days here on this sight 🙂

      Hello Charis,
      I appreciate both Crystal’s comment and your feedback. It figures that one of us INFJ would have responded first on this 🙂
      I particularly have a challenge understanding how to develop my co-pilot Fe in a way that makes sense to me and life. As Antonia said feelings are unreliable. Yet I am deeply invested in personal growth and development, interested in what is inspiring and unlimiting like my Ni affords me and what makes sense.
      I have responsibilities and bills to pay. But if I fall into my Fe I may feel like doing nothing, I may be inconsistent, unreliable, and may show up as irresponsible and never accomplish anything.
      Is this a legitimate concern or is this an indication that perhaps I am using my 10 year old Ti correctly. I think if I can get a real life example of the infj cognitive processes mapped to actual life activities and see how these fits together to create a sensible, sustainable, yet successful infj life it would be really helpful for my Ni to begin to run with.

      Thank you 🙂

      • Charis Branson
        Reply

        Thanks for the comment, L! To quote you:

        “I have responsibilities and bills to pay. But if I fall into my Fe I may feel like doing nothing, I may be inconsistent, unreliable, and may show up as irresponsible and never accomplish anything.”

        You aren’t describing Fe here. This doesn’t even sound much like tertiary Ti. It sounds like Tertiary or inferior Fi.

  • Andrea
    Reply

    This was super helpful! I’ve been hesitant to really get into my copilot because it does seem so daunting as an introvert. Sometimes I think my driver Authenticity doesn’t get enough love, so I feel like I don’t have the energy to get into my Exploration. Journaling and creative expression sounds like a great thing that I’ve kind of fallen out of lately. I love the idea of practicing the extroverted function in your daily activities. I’m going to have to be extroverted at some point during the day, it might as well be Exploration. Very interesting. I’ll have to do that!

  • wenwen
    Reply

    This is great. Hey Charis, I am an INTP. It sounds like you are one too? I realized that as I get more in tune with my feeling and experiencing more and more flow experiences my VOICE starts to change. I don’t think it’s just me getting older ( I am 32. Artist/entrepreneur ), I realize whenever I am in my “ELEMENT” my voice gets lower……what is up with that? With my closest friends and my husband my voice can get SUPER deep as I get into my “THINKING” mode. Does that happen to other INTP/FPS?

    • Charis Branson
      Reply

      Hi Wenwen! Actually, I am an INFJ. I used to think I was an INTP for a long time, though. I still show a preference for Ti, but it gets me into trouble when I use it over Fe.

      As to your voice, Thinkers voices typically show less inflection than Feelers. And they will usually get more robotic in their speech as they try and get their point across. And by robotic, I mean flat, even tones, so the information comes across clearly.

      I hope that answers your question. 🙂 Btw, I am flattered that you think I express myself like an INTP. I love INTPs!

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