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In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about the introvert advantage in a world that is becoming more and more extraverted.

In this podcast on the introvert advantage you’ll find:

  • Introversion gets a lot of misunderstanding. People in general have a lot of confusion about introversion and extraversion.
  • Do introverts have a disadvantage in this world? Do they have issues that are very unique to them?
  • There are a lot of great performers that are introverts who can perform and speak very well.
  • In business, life and social circles, people are expected to be extroverts. Public speaking, for example, is a challenge for some people.
  • Introverts need time to be alone in order to recover their energy while extraverts get their energy by being in the environment and interacting with people.
  • Energy is being managed differently by introverts and extraverts.
  • Introverts – Inner world is the real world. When the outer world isn’t mirroring their inner world experience, they reconcile both worlds which takes too much energy.
  • Extraverts – Outer world is the real world. Spending too much time alone drains their energy. In order to understand what’s really going on, they have to go outside of themselves.
  • The outer world doesn’t specifically have to be people.
  • When you understand people at a profound level, you can see and understand where they are coming from.
  • Introverts have a great advantage to grow than extraverts.
  • If you are an introvert, developing your extraverted process is the path to growth.
  • Extraverts may find it more comfortable to live in an over communicated world, but it’s not helping them to develop their introverted process.
  • Introverts need time to think and consider what they have to say.
  • Every single personality type has a breakdown of 8 mental processes. 2 of these processes are the preferred way of navigating the world which balances human beings.
  • Not all kinds extraversion is equal for all personality types. It helps if you know your personality type and the style of extraversion that is the growth path for your personality type.
  • One of the best thing you can do to begin your personal growth journey is to know your personality. Knowing what kind of extraversion you’re going to grow as introvert is powerful.

 

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  • Trevor
    Reply

    Hey guys!

    Just wanted to start by saying, I love your podcasts. I’ve been listening to them for the past few months (right around the time you did the series on intuition), and look forward to them every week :).

    This week’s is especially interesting to me, because I’ve been trying to determine if I am an introvert or an extravert. I’ve always identified as the former because I’m pretty quiet a lot of the times, and despite being better than I used to be, am still shy in new situations. I’m also an enneagram 9. So, I’m not overly, as you put it, ‘bombastic’, though I do act, so putting on am overly dramatic show for the kicks of it is a lot of fun lol. I’ve taken your assessment, as well as a few others, I’ve read stuff on the functions and stuff, and I still can’t determine my type… especially since, as you’ve mentioned, an extraverts engagement with the real world doesn’t necessarily equate to being social. I enjoy it, but due to life experience, I’ve also learned to be happy with my own company. Anyway, I’ve enjoyed the journey so far, because I’ve been able to read and learn a bunch of new stuff along the way about an area that I really enjoy and see so much potential in (especially in my professional field, education), but it seems like the more I read the more confused I become in regards to my own type lol. I also want to know which path I need to take in order to grow… to, in a brief sense, explore more (Ne) or get in touch with my values and make authentic decisions (Fi)…

    As you can probably guess, I have narrowed it down to either INFP or ENFP… and so, my question is this: What do you mean an introverts world is their ‘real’ world? What does that even look like? It seems very abstract to me, and a bit hard to relate to my own experience… I’m not sure if I have to reconcile the outer world to my inner experience, or if it’s just my shyness that I need to overcome? Any information you can offer that you think can help would be much appreciated :).

    • Antonia Dodge
      Reply

      Thanks for the question, Trevor. 🙂

      The phrase “the inner world is the real world” for an Introvert is necessarily abstract, because that’s going to look a little different for each introverted type. It depends upon your Driver process. If you’ve narrowed it down to Fi being your decision-making process, then the introverted experience is going to be about your inner emotional world being the ‘real world’. If you feel very strongly about something and the outer world isn’t resonating, you might feel some need to reevaluate, but ultimately how you feel is going to trump ‘outer world’ feedback.

      For an NFP, the extraverted process is Ne. We have a tendency to enjoy our learning process even when it’s not our Driver and, on top of that, the Feeling preference can enjoy more socializing just in general. So, an NFP can be naturally confused by their E/I preference. They don’t dislike hanging around people, and when they do they’re in a place that’s really enjoyable – Ne. That combo seems to make INFPs appear deceptively extraverted.

      When it’s really difficult to tell a person’s E/I preference, I usually look at the ‘backseat’ passengers – their tertiary and inferior processes, or what we call the 10 Year Old and 3 Year Old processes in the Car Model. Do you have a tendency to hole yourself up with books, artistic pursuits, etc. and ignore the world for long hours (sometimes days) at a time? That would be more a sign of Si tertiary (or, Memory 10 Year Old). Or do you have a tendency to say an enthusiastic “YES!” to every opportunity that comes by, over commit and spend long hours working hard for something you suddenly realize you don’t believe in, get extremely frustrated and take it out on walls/doors? That would be a sign of Te tertiary (or, Effectiveness 10 Year Old).

      I’m not sure how meaningful it is to have me ‘type’ you going on just a single post, but… my guess would be that you’re an INFP. With the combo of shyness and Enneagram 9 the stereotypes would all lead to INFP. (There are ENFPs that experience/feel shyness, but you’d never know – they have an amazing ability to mask an sense of inadequacy they may feel).

      Anyway, hope that helps.

      -A-

  • Trevor
    Reply

    Hi Antonia,

    Thanks for the response 🙂

    I wasn’t looking to be ‘typed’ lol just wanting more information to evaluate 🙂

    As far as the 10 year old processes go, I do both of your examples. However, I may not always know what I want, but I usually know what I don’t want. But I still end up saying yes to those people :P. I’m constantly over committed. I probably am an INFP – my home life has just been stressful for a while, so I feel drained at home and refreshed after I go out with friends. And I’ve been feeling the need to get out in the world, probably leading me to be and feel more extroverted.

    Anyway, thank you, I appreciate your help 🙂

    -Trev

  • jdanzer
    Reply

    Joel made the comment that he has doubts about the existence of “ambiverts”.
    This is a casualty of Jung’s scheme. All of the functions in MBTI actually fit the bell-curve. The same can be said about the dimension of introversion/extraversion.

    It has been claimed that 50% of the people are introverted and 50% of the people are extroverted. If that is the case a significant number of people are in the mid-range where they may be either depending on their environment.
    This is an emergent factor that takes on significance when considering how adaptable people are.

    For example; there are studies that show ambiverted people are better at sales than those who are clearly extraverted. It seems that there are some subtleties that fall through the cracks of a typology system that stresses dichotomous scoring such as mbti.

    This is why a good coach/counselor should be familiar with as many systems of classification as possible – and not always the most popular systems. MBTI is perhaps a good doorway because of it’s popular acceptance but personality testing is a rich field with many useful orientations.

  • Jenn
    Reply

    Hello!

    I just want say I’m in love with your podcasts. Personality Psychology has come one of my obsessions lately. I’m an INFJ. I’ve read a couple book from Dan Johnston. I think they’re wonderful. But I want to learn even more about all the 16 personalities. Also look more into being an INFJ. Is there any books you guys would recommend??

    • Antonia Dodge
      Reply

      Hi, Jenn. Sorry I missed this comment the first time around. One of the best books on Myers-Briggs is Lenore Thomson’s “Personality Types: An Owner’s Manual.” For the Enneagram I recommend starting with “Wisdom of the Enneagram” by Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson.

      Thanks for the comment!

      -A-

  • Teresa
    Reply

    A nice way of putting it, that society’s bias towards extraversion gives introverts opportunity to grow.

    However, I believe one of the real hazards for introverts of our over-communicated world, is failure to ever understand our dominant or “driver” function, because it doesn’t seem like anything anybody would ever want. (Perhaps that is extra true for us Ni dominants, who tend to get the message during childhood that Te or Fe, and even Ti is so much more useful than Ni). As a result, we spend a lot of time trying to get better at something we’re not especially talented at, while ignoring the development of our dominant function and failing to seek out a position where we can put forward our greatest talents into the world.

    For myself, I truly agree with your conclusions and I find I am at a great advantage as an introvert to really contribute, as well as to enjoy personal growth and happiness. But this has only happened after long long years of detours before I understood where my real strengths lay. So I would say, especially for introverts: by all means develop your co-pilot but first and foremost we must identify and develop our driver (probably completely unnecessary advice for most extraverts).

    Anyway, thanks for a great site with lots of insights!

    • Joel Mark Witt
      Reply

      Thanks Teresa for the feedback. You have some great points about Ni and how introverts deal with something different than us Extraverts. Well put.

    • Antonia Dodge
      Reply

      Absolutely – if an individual doesn’t have permission to develop and engage their primary function you’ll see a very depressed person. A big part of our mission is to wake Intuitives up to their potential and help them get that permission. Thanks for the comment. 🙂

      -A-

  • Robin
    Reply

    I just listened to this b/c my daughter is an introvert. Do you think your parents forced you to “preform” and that is why you have that skill to perform and that is an advantage? There is simply no way my introvert would get up and public speak- no matter how much I want her to develop that skill and to develop that in her. I had to stop listening b/c you simply have no, no, no idea.

    • Antonia Dodge
      Reply

      I’m confused about your objection to this podcast.

      You’re absolutely correct – I don’t know your individual circumstances or your daughter. I’m not sure why you think this podcast was making a claim to understand everyone’s unique situation. This podcast is an attempt to help Introverts understand that they’re not at a universal disadvantage in a culture that seems to prize extraversion and/or a technological space which seems to demand it of us.

      Your daughter has an advantage in that the world will encourage her out of her comfort zone. She will still have to choose to be out of that comfort zone in order to grow. Like all of us.

      Did you feel we insulted your parenting? When I said “most parents don’t put their kids in front of a microphone…” did you think I was judging you for not having done so with your child?

      There’s no judgment. It was an observation. It is true that few parents encourage their kids to speak publicly. It’s not an indictment.

      Public speaking isn’t an off/on switch. It – like almost everything – is a skill that is honed over time. I’m sure your daughter wouldn’t automatically get up in front of an audience and speak into a microphone with confidence. That’s not really something anyone does. But that doesn’t mean she couldn’t take the same baby steps everyone else proficient in public speaking has had to do.

      There’s no need to limit anyone in what they can do, either through word or action or our beliefs about them.

      -A-

  • Astre
    Reply

    I am simply amazed by your podcast. INFP here 🙂 I’ll write much more later, just wanted to drop it now!

  • Sarah Turco
    Reply

    At the beginning of the podcast you were talking about how we live in a performance based society and culture, and that social media and the internet pose somewhat of a disadvantage to introverts who are expected to put themselves out there through these mediums. I think the internet and social media actually create a very safe, comfortable place for introverts to express themselves. As introvert, I am more comfortable writing than speaking, so I can write eloquently (without a time limit) about anything I want through Facebook and Tumblr. I can also share my drawings on social media if I so chose. I can decide to put exclusively my best work out there for the world to see. I can record myself playing a piece of music on the piano and do as many takes as I need for it to be perfect. Then I can post it on YouTube. The possibilities are endless. This is probably my Ne (exploration) talking (I’m an INFP), so I guess that brings me to the conclusion of your podcast when you talked about introverts being encouraged to use their growth process (which is extroverted). Maybe the reason I’m so cool with expressing myself through the internet is because I’m using my auxiliary function. Good to know. Anyway, I suppose I just proved your point. Great podcast by the way. Very educational.

  • Ralph Rickenbach
    Reply

    Hi there

    I absolutely agree with your depiction of introversion seeing their inner world as the real world and having to spend energy to reconcile the seemingly inconsistent outer world when the two are diverging.

    I am an INTP. With a more than capital N in there. I build an inner abstract representation or model and do not care whether the concrete outer world implementation fits that model. If I want to make the outer world conform to my inner representation, then through (lovingly) teaching and modelling a lifestyle.

    Would you agree that the INTP is the one personality type that does not so much care about this discrepancy, whereas the INTJ is more inclined to reconcile the two by even proving that he/she is right?

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