INTx Preview Interview #6 - Christian (INTP)

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JOEL MARK WITT: Hey, welcome back to this final recording in our short series, based on our new INTx unleashed program. My name is Joel Mark Witt.

ANTONIA DODGE: And I am Antonia Dodge.

JOEL MARK WITT: We’re here from Personality Hacker and we want to basically go into another little snippet of a interview and how we’ve been doing this, we’re taking small, little snippets from this program ’cause the program INTx unleashed is basically a series of interviews with high-performing INTJs and INTPs and we’re asking them the strategies and the mindsets and the shifts they have had in their life to become high performers.

And we’re doing this for two reasons. We’re doing these short recordings for two reasons. Number one, we want to show you what the program’s like as you begin to make a good decision for yourself, whether or not to invest in this program. We would love for you to do that, we think you should do that but obviously you’re the one that makes that decision for yourself. So we want to give you enough information to make a decision, so we give you little samples of the interviews, we give you some conversation around those samples and some actual a-has and that’s actually leads me to the second point of why we do this. We want to give you actual content.

Any time when we release a new program, we like to create some content around that program to help you in your life, regardless of your ability to invest in the program at the time of these recordings. So those are the two reasons why we are doing this little short series of recordings about the INTx unleashed program.

ANTONIA DODGE: Yeah, and the reason why we chose to do interviews with high-performing INTPs and INTJs is that neither Joel nor I is an INTP or an INTJ. However, we knew that we could call some really excellent information from top performers and so what this looks like is it’s a series of interviews with INTPs and INTJs, both men and women, who have their own unique challenges. And then there is also a series of what we call highlights. With every single interview, there is a highlight session where we talk about and ruminate over what we just heard and pick out some of the major a-has. And Joel and I, we’ve been doing this for a long time, I’ve been coaching for a super long time. I’ve coached plenty of INTJs and INTPs and yet, I came away with a ton of a-has around these interviews. So we felt that was the highest leverage was we had people who can speak your language, understand your challenges because they’ve lived them and then be able to give you some of their best tips and strategies and solutions.

Now, it doesn’t matter where you’re at in your growth process, we have used Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs as a guide to be able to determine whether or not, no matter where you’re at in your process, you’ll be able to benefit from these interviews and when we matched up the interviews with Maslow’s hierarchy, we realized that people talked about literally every level. All the way from people fearing genocide or extermination, all the way up to self-actualization and ego transcendence.

And everything in between, so no matter where you’re at in your process, just use Maslow’s hierarchy and we help you do that to self-diagnose where you’re at and then listen for the suggestions and tips and strategies the people had at those levels to be able to transcend them and go to the next.

JOEL MARK WITT: So the series started out with a snippet from recording where he talks about as an INTJ going to the world, this chaotic world that doesn’t make any sense, people seem irrational to him. And we float into another interview snippet from AJ who talks about the doubt that he brings to the tables in INTP. Doubt even in his relationships and we unpacked a little bit of that.

Then we went into Catherine and Tom. Catherine talked about taking on a role to try and solve some of the challenges she had as an INTJ in her life and then Tom talked about this attachment to being right and how to loosen the attachment from rightness to be able to go to a connection in his life with other people.

And then in the last recording we heard from Patricia who talked about becoming attractive as a person, by getting into flow and really anchoring herself with safety in her life. And in this recording, we’ve almost come full circle. We’re gonna talk with … we’re gonna pull a little snippet away from the interview with Christian Ramos who is an INTP and again, he goes back into the theme that Brent talked about but this time it’s from an INTP’s perspective. He talks about the chaos of vibing with people in real time.

So basically this emotional connection or emotional vibe that people have in life that you as an INT, INTJ or INTP, might think looks insane, it might look chaotic, it might not make any sense. In fact Christian mentions that in this next clip about how it doesn’t make any sense. So let’s go ahead and hear that clip now and then we will talk about it right afterward.

CHRISTIAN: So one of the things you are doing wrong in my field, we call it killing the vibe. Okay? So basically, what you’re doing is, there’s a vibe, it’s an emotional vibe that’s going on in either between two people or a group of people. And this is very complicated because this is way outside your awareness, you’re gonna have to learn this consciously. If there’s something going on, right? A particular topic and a particular , even if it doesn’t makes sense, it’s contributing to the emotions of the group, which is what people are concentrating on.

So you’ll be surprised. Most of those interactions do not make any sense whatsoever. This is very harsh for an INT to comprehend. Yeah, it’s just … matter of fact, usually the less sense it makes, the more fun it is. So we can just start there with try not to make sense when you’re socially interacting with people, make it fun and make it lively. This is gonna be challenging at first and your whole being is gonna go against this but it is something that needs to happen.

So I’ll give you some examples of what that’s like. And by the way, it comes up a little bit different for INTJs and INTPs.

JOEL MARK WITT: Okay.

CHRISTIAN: So some of the things that INTPs are doing are they’re asking too many details. So like listening or laughing in a group and they’re “Oh, my God, but the penguin and then that day the penguin flew” and I had to be more like being there in the middle of the “What do you mean? Penguins don’t fly, that’s impossible”. So that would always bring down the mood of the scenario, right?

Now INTJs would naturally, from what I’ve noticed, be a little bit more cynical. So they’re a little bit more subject to like disagreeing with somebody which also brings down the mood. even natural tendencies or not geared at all for social dynamics.

JOEL MARK WITT: Penguins don’t fly.

ANTONIA DODGE: That’s impossible.

JOEL MARK WITT: But you get this illustration of this vibing nature of emotions between two people or a group of people like Christian describes here and he just illustrated how maybe an INTP or an INTJ might respond to social situations that did what he called killing the vibe which I thought was really interesting.

ANTONIA DODGE: Yeah, and what I love about his full interview is that he gives a lot of distinctions like that and a lot of basically how-to’s on if you’re at that level, if you’re playing at the level where it’s hard for you to read the vibe, he has stories about how a whole evening will go wonderfully, maybe he is on a date and everything is going really great and then all of a sudden he says something, foot goes in the mouth, the person never wants to see him again and he mentions this happened over and over and over again for him.

And that he went from a place where he couldn’t maintain any relationship with anybody it felt like, except for family members all the way up to having this thriving social life where he actually has too many social engagements. And he did that by breaking down the system of interaction.

Now what’s really great about his interview is that when he broke down the system of interaction, when there were components to it that he didn’t particularly get or maybe like or weren’t natural to him, like this concept of reading the emotional energy or the vibe as opposed to wanting to connect on a digital way, right, like in a more data-heavy way, what’s great about Christian is he walks through the process of meeting that node in the system where it’s at, as opposed to going “Well, that’s stupid, I don’t want to do that.”

He walks the process of making peace with those components, breaking down the system and then going “You know what? If I’m gonna have the rewards I want, if I’m gonna have that social life that I desire, I’m gonna have to meet it at least halfway if not on its terms” and he talks about how to do that.

He also talks about when you can’t do that because some of this will just be a blind spot for you, if you can’t do that, he talks about strategies for getting around it.

JOEL MARK WITT: What I love about Christian’s interview is he basically gives you rationality to the irrationality of social interactions. And he pretty much uses his superpower of breaking things down logically to show how it’s logical to think about things illogical, it’s just basically a tweak there.

And I know Christian, I’ve hung out with him literally in person and he’s really, for an INTP, an INT and an INTP in particular, when we say thriving social life, I’m not kidding. He’s actually able to walk up to anybody, stranger or friend, strike up a conversation, create an emotional connection with that person and create what he talks about in that snippet we just played which is that emotional vibe. He actually knows how to create that as an INTP and in the interview, he gives specific strategies how to do that which I love.

ANTONIA DODGE: Yeah, so not only does he talk about going from social phobia to a thriving social life and not only does he talk about INTPs and INTJs and what they might be doing wrong in social situations and how they can overcome it. He also mentions strategies for maintaining your authenticity throughout it. Things like using radical honesty to your advantage. Now you might have to pick up other skills and merge them together which he talks about as well. But it’s not a matter of becoming fake and that’s not what he espouses.

He talks about strategies for using your natural talent in wiring to get the rewards you want in a social world. He also talks about the seemingly unrelated areas of your life you might be avoiding or neglecting and ignoring that directly impact your ability to form and maintain relationships. So he picks up the system, the holistic system, not just one or two areas but the whole thing that helps create an emergent of a thriving social life.

He also talks about transcending fear, this is something that has been a theme throughout all of the sessions, all of the interviews we do. Everybody talks about a relationship or how you can build a relationship with fear as opposed to constantly be running away from it. And as mentioned, he also has tips to make up for your perpetual people blinds spots. So if there’s something that you need in a social situation that you’re just not picking up, he gives some strategies on how to get around that and some perspectives that allow you to make it so that it’s gonna be okay.

JOEL MARK WITT: So this is the final recording that we’re gonna put together, this short series here about the INTx unleashed program and we’ve talked a lot about it, we’ve told you what’s in the program, we’ve pulled snippets from the actual interviews and we’ve talked about those. And if this is something you’re interested, if you’re an INTP or an INTJ, we believe this program will be very helpful for you. We stand behind it and we think that this is a good program for you to invest in.

Of course we want you to make that decision for yourself, if you haven’t listened to the other recordings we created in this short series here to help you make that decision, please go back and listen to them so you can make the best informed decision. If you know that you’re ready to make that decision you can go ahead and get the program over personalityhacker.com and there’s a way to do that there.

But we really want you to consider investing because we believe that you as an INT, INTJ or INTP, have some very unique challenges, I think all of us, depending on our personality have unique challenges, but right now, we’re talking about you as an INTP or INTJ and we’re focused in on those challenges and some of the strategies that these high-performing INTPs and INTJs have come up with to solve those challenges, to move past them, to embrace them and to live excellent lives moving forward and not getting bogged down in the details of trying to figure something out that’s so frustrating.

ANTONIA DODGE: Yeah, if you’ve been following Personality Hacker for a while, you may have seen the survey that went out. If you were one of the people who answered the survey, you helped us craft this entire program. We really listened to you, we listened to the challenges you were experiencing and some of the things that were the biggest pain points in your life. And we made sure to utilize the questions you asked and address the pain points that you commented to us, we made sure that the interviews addressed those.

We asked these high performers “What did you do to get through this issue? How do you get through something like dealing with smalltalk?” And we have a variety of responses, one of those responses is probably gonna be your sweet spot.

We have it all the way from “I don’t do that anymore and this is what I do instead”, all the way over to “Here’s how I handle smalltalk and this is the way that I engage and address it”. There are a lot of different solutions in here and some of them might not work for you and some of them might work beautifully for you but we recommend that you listen to all of the interviews.

If you’re an INTP, listen to the INTJs interviews, if you’re an INTJ, listen to the INTP interviews. All of it has some really good meat in it. And they are all talking about the things that you told us were your biggest pain points.

JOEL MARK WITT: Now if you’re considering getting this program because you have an INTJ or an INTP in your life, I think that can be very helpful for you. I think if you’re a different type and you’re like “I really want to understand my lover, my spouse”, I believe it can be helpful for you, this is designed specifically for INTs but I think if you know how to take things and contextualize it for your own life and how you see things on your side, if you’re in a relationship with somebody like this, I believe it can be helpful.

But I do want to give a warning here. We did this, I think in Tom’s session, one of the short sessions back. We don’t edit anything and there’s extreme language, we use extreme language and our guests use extreme language. We didn’t think it would be in order to edit that down, if you’re an INTJ or an INTP, we think you’d probably be able to handle that so we didn’t think we needed to edit that. But just a warning for other types that might get this, it might be a little edgy for you on some of the language and other things because we .

ANTONIA DODGE: Yeah, it’s not excessive, it’s not like somebody is dropping the f-bomb every minute, and yet at the same time, we wanted to make sure that everybody felt completely free to talk about their experience, however they needed to talk about it.

So we haven’t censored any of the language out, like Joel mentioned, we haven’t edited it. So there is that component and if that’s off putting, we want to make sure that you know that right away. However, we feel like because of that, we got a lot of authenticity, we got a lot of people really talking about their experience in as much detail and graphicness as they needed to.

And we feel like this program … I haven’t created a program in a little while. However, that said, I don’t know if I put this much time and effort into a program in a very long while. Like this is one of my favorite programs that we’ve ever put together. Each of the sessions is an interview and then a highlight reel from Joel and I listening back to the session, taking extensive notes, taking lots of notes during the interview itself and then getting the a-has. So if you listen to a session and you really kind of almost want like a post game on it, we do a post game.

We talk about the things that we believe were the highest leverage pieces of information and pieces of advice that an INT, regardless of whether an INTP or an INTJ can call from their experiences and anecdotes.

JOEL MARK WITT: Yeah, and my guess is that you’re gonna listen to the interviews, just the interviews themselves before the highlights. You’re gonna find things in those that we didn’t even out. You’re gonna find a-has and connections, especially if you listen to all of them, they’re starting to build on each other. Themes emerge, strategies emerge, tips and action steps emerge, they start to weave together and I just know that you’re probably gonna start to build your own action plan from these interviews, as well as some of the things that we have contextualized and made available to you as well on those highlight reels.

ANTONIA DODGE: Yeah, of course we stand by all of our products and programs, so if you don’t love it, let us know. We do a 30 day return policy, basically no questions asked, we ask you a question like “How could we have made it better?” but other than that, we don’t require you to justify why you are returning it.

So if this is not the right program for you, let us know and of course, we stand by, as a 30 day guarantee, we stand by all of our programs and you’ll get a full refund.

JOEL MARK WITT: Yeah, so this is INTx unleashed program, designed specifically for you as an INTJ or you as an INTP and we love for you to invest in this program, invest in yourself and come over and give it a go, it will be a really good program for you.

You can find more information and get the program at personalityhacker.com. I’m Joel Mark Witt.

ANTONIA DODGE: And I’m Antonia Dodge.

JOEL MARK WITT: And we’ll talk with you very soon.