Podcast – Episode 0288 – Being An ENFJ Man (with Denzel Mensah)

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In this episode, Joel and Antonia talk with online influencer Denzel Mensah about being an ENFJ.

In this podcast you’ll find:


In this episode Joel and Antonia talk with online influencer Denzel Mensah about being an ENFJ. #ENFJ #ENFJmale

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Showing 11 comments
  • Elijah

    Hi everyone I just recently discovered that I am an ENFJ while doing some career searching. I have been all over looking for insights and more info on trying to find my passion. I have seen small glimpse here and there but after my research and personality hackers amazing podcast I was able to have a lot of things click, and draw conclusions to a lot of my personal experiences as well as see my own thinking patterns and begin to discover more about how I see myself. How I see the world and view people’s perspectives and would like to learn more about how I can better myself and others. It is quite eye opening to see many truths revealed. Definitely something I believe in now for everyone to look into is their own personality traits and characteristics as they see fit. Knowing more about your make up and wiring helps ease the mind and hopefully can bring you and others joy. Once again great podcast!

  • Jeff Klassen

    I appreciate Denzel’s experience. I am an INFJ so there is some overlap. I am also trying to figure out my enneagram, and think I might be a self-preservation-social peacemaker. All sorts of tangents and thoughts come up in my mind …

  • Rebecca Mielke

    Thank you! It was super refreshing to hear a whole episode about how an ENFJ thinks. I am fascinated by all things type, but I guess I always figured all the other ENFJs were just too busy doing important things in the world to talk about it, lol. It is a bit lonely sometimes; who has the stamina to actually listen to my thoughts? Looking for that INFJ friend 😉 I have a couple other ENFJs I am close to, but it seems like they are starved enough for understanding that it takes a minute to get around to my “turn” in the conversation.
    Anyway, this was great! Thank you!

    • Aaron Izworski

      Hello, I am a newly discovered ENFJ also a male and it so refreshing to know that there are people out there that can truly understand the complexity of me. Since discovering my own personality type I have become obsessed with learning all I can about my own type but also those close to me so I can optimize the relationships I have with them. Some of the points Denzel made in this podcast spoke to me on such a deep level it was uncanny. For example, the breaking point of anger and expressing that, as I like to call it “going for the jugular” or “trying to bury” someone is incredibly accurate and something I’m trying to manage. Thank you again for these very insightful podcasts! Can’t wait to listen to the next one!!

  • Kathleen Erickson

    Thank you Denzel. What an amazing person you are. I am surprised how different ENFJ is from ENTJ, which is what I am. We share Perspectives and Sensation in the same position, so I am learning how to use those better by listening to you. Also Accuracy in the blind spot is similar to my Authenticity in the blind spot. But overall, the feeling is so different because of the driver. I know that when I slow down I become a much more well-rounded, effective person: In other words, when I stop trying to be so effective and do things, I am actually more in tune with people and hence more effective! Long way of saying I wish I was more like you!

  • Kim Kessler

    Thank you so much for having Denzel on the show. It was such a comfort to hear another ENFJ share so passionately and describe clearly what I experience.

  • Aaron W.

    Thank you for bringing Denzel on the podcast! I’m also an ENFJ, who is a Christian African American male, so not only can I relate to Denzel on several levels but I was very impressed by the way that he painted a picture of the way that we think.
    A very powerful trait that I have is sacrificial altruism, or you can call it a Superman complex. It’s a strong desire to serve others even if it hurts me. This can be a very noble trait, but sometimes it is motivated by guilt, which some personality types intensionally or unintentionally take advantage of.
    I will likely listen to this episode again, because I felt like you were interviewing me! This was very insightful. Thank you!

  • Seanna

    Oh my gosh! Thank you so much for this podcast. I am an ENFJ and definitely identify with what you all described as a lack of attention towards my type. I have speculated why this is and have a theory that we are kind of the “easy” type in terms of giving output without a lot of drama and so my experiences with content have frequently been almost quick “summary”. Additionally, I think this summarizing could be attributed to the Ni tendency to throw details under a broader heading. Finally, our outward focus on others takes up a lot of our time and I believe less is focused on understanding ourselves by detail.

    While I don’t find this lack of attention personally offensive I do sometimes feel frustrated wanting to understand myself better and identify with others who have the same processes of thinking.

    I found this podcast super helpful and immediately identified with Denzels description of how he shows up and experiences his functions. Even though we are one of the most social types I think being an enfj can be very lonely because I often feel misunderstood or like others have no idea where I’m coming from. Was really nice to hear someone else processes life the same way and I’m not just weird 🙂

  • David

    Hi guys, amazing episode. Thanks to Denzel on the insights – followed him on Twitter now. I’ve always been fascinated as to the mind and workings of the ENFJ and luckily enough I have one of my best friends (male) who I’ve identified as one. Being an ISFP male myself it’s fun to hear from another “rare” personality / gender combination to hear from.

    Maybe it’s because of a similar Enneagram typing or the fact that I’m very in touch with my tertiary Ni (looper), but I could deeply relate to what Denzel was referring to in terms of just “knowing” things (less so than him & I trust these knowings less) or having an inclination to seek depth in personal conversation and analysis (Driver Fi flying about somewhere in there). The shower portal and driving examples for stilling the body via Se is something I naturally do & recognise as beneficial – the link to how that opens up Intuition is a beautiful epiphany moment – I can refer to previous shower moments and understand why they happened.

    Great episode – would love to hear more from rare personality / gender combinations e.g. ISFP male *wink*, INTJ female etc.

    Keep it up guys!

  • Amanda Carrington

    Is it weird or normal for me, an INFP, to be in touch with my introverted intuition as well? When Denzel was talking about it, I was like, yes! Totally! Like I know things, but not always predicting interpersonal dynamics like ENFJ’s and INFJ’s, but the rest of what he said about introverted intuition was right on!

  • Kori Plank

    I absolutely loved this episode as an ENFJ it was great to hear from Denzel and relate with him. I too find myself having these feeling of knowing that is unexplainable and I never thought to relate it to my co-pilot of introverted intuition. I also find myself going into my own head in conversations and start generating ideas that I then have to pull myself back to focus. I loved his concept of shower portals, I definitely do this as well, also I find myself taking a long way home to be in the car a bit longer to comb through my thoughts and ideas.
    Again, this was such a great episode!

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