Podcast – Episode 0327 – Noble Vices Of Each Personality Type
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In this episode, Joel and Antonia talk about the noble vices of each personality type.
In this podcast you’ll find:
- Betsy Garmon, who we interviewed for our Empowered course for INFJs and INFPs , introduced the idea of noble distractions.
- What is a noble distraction / noble vice?
- Why is a noble vice bad for us even though the story around it is good?
- Looking at codependency as a type of noble vice.
- The world often rewards us for noble vices
- How to start looking at your noble vices through your 10 Year Old function
- An example from some INTP group coaching sessions
- What is it about our 10 Year Old and the way we use it that makes it a good place to start?
- What does the noble vice narrative look like for each 10 Year Old function, and how can we use our Copilot to reframe this?
- ExFPs – Effectiveness (Te)
- Moving from “a flurry of action” towards “presence”
- ExTPs – Harmony (Fe)
- Gaining social approval versus “living your truth”
- Thoughts on why noble vices can’t go on indefinitely
- How does feedback keep dissonance going?
- Internal expectations and noble vices
- IxFJ – Accuracy (Ti)
- How can you move from perfectionism to meeting needs?
- IxTJ – Authenticity (Fi)
- Moving beyond a static identity
- INxPs – Memory (Si)
- The virtue of consistency versus getting out of your comfort zone
- ISxPs – Perspectives (Ni)
- Overcoming image management as a vice
- ESxJs – Exploration (Ne)
- The importance of slowing down instead of “reinventing the wheel”
- ENxJs – Sensation (Se)
- Being active as image management – and how this robs you of “meaning”
- The noble vices we are rewarded for are the hardest to identify.
- Looking at noble vices beyond your 10 Year Old function.
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As an INTJ, I definitely see where this has come up for me in my life. My tertiary position is Fi (Authenticity). I struggle to find that one thing that will really resonate with me for my career. I also have an ideal of being a truly authentic person in the world, which I’m starting to realize is not a strength for my personality type.
Very helpful podcast, thanks a lot!
Oh no! My addiction to the thesaurus has been busted! I feel so exposed😅
I was talking to someone in a group for E type 4s/5s and a question was asked about the process of artists of that type and a very recurrent theme emerged that I can also see relating to my MBTI type.
I used to be preoccupied with creating something totally unique to the point I would get stuck in my head trying to come up with the most “special” idea ever created… (I know… embarrassing😂). What I actually ended up producing was absolutely s#!t because I had put no time into developing my craft I didn’t have the skills to put my ideas into practice.
I’m sure this comes up in so many other areas of my life that I am going to be on the look out for!
Joel… I absolutely agree with Antonia that you can tell when you are present in your Fi during the podcasts, I feel like I get to see and experience much more of you…. they’re great!
Same goes for you Antonia with your Ti.
Both of your kindness and competence still shines through when you are not actively using the tertiary function.
Mucho Gracias😀
ENFP here.
Thank you for another great podcast. Joel thanks for your honesty. “That Joel can be trusted..!” I totally get it! I really want to believe in trusting me to.
I told my husband how much it sucks that you once again nailed it and told me what I am like. You guys seem to know the lies I tell myself better than I do sometimes!!😂 Anyway. Thanks again. Your podcasts are a relief in these times of trouble. Stay healthy.
By the way I once had a great career at something I absolutely hated. It was 9-5 office work and it killing me. Sucking my life out of me. I was payed well and the advancement opportunities were great. Thank God I had the courage to leave and start a new before becoming dependent on the amount of income I was making. Some people had a hard time understanding my choice.
I truly appreciated this pod! Lots of mind-bending marginal yet critical scenarios for my INTP brain to put together :). Yes, INTP! The part that truly resonated with me was the need to acknowledge and have compassion for the part of me that DOESN’T want to feel that he cares what other people think. This kind of imposed separation, isolation, arrogance — listening to the pod, I can see how it holds me back in reaching out with my vision and efforts to really meet the people across the table or across the interwebs, whoever they may be.
Yes, I’m finding my 3 yr old shows up strongest in my career as an architect. I’ve worked in big offices — doesn’t work! lol. I seem to find ways to either ignore or even (embarrassed) look down on my coworkers unless I feel they see the whole me — the whole me such an office environment I assume doesn’t even want. Total sabotage! Small offices with intimate connections between competent people, fighting through challenges together, seeing each other’s warts and inner warriors — that’s where I’ve felt best re: that pesky 3 yr old.
Thanks again for this challenging topic!
Fellow INTP here! I’ve had the pleasure of working in those small, tight knit groups most of my career and it is such a joy when teams can build that camaraderie where you can do great work in an environment that stimulates that inferior Fe.
When talking about the INP’s tertiary Si, at first I was a little distant, thinking “while I’d like to be more dependable, I think everyone who matters has figured me out at this point”. But when they reworded it to say rather that INP’s want to be “non-threatening”, I immediately felt that sting where some core truth just got hit. I want the stability and connection of Si and Fe, but experience has taught me that I have to significantly dial down TiNe in order to get there.
Recently I got unexpectedly bumped into a position where I had to lead a new team. I could actually use some advice because I find I’m trying to lead from SiFe – determine a process and be considerate of others. Sounds great, except I’m obviously struggling to lead from my weakness. However, in line with wanting to be “non-threatening”, and knowing how chaotic my own growth path and strengths can look to others, I just don’t want to subject others to that. (Not to mention having to explain why I’m breaking every rule or process in some way to management all the time.) Thoughts?
You should NOT dial down your Introverted Thinking and Extraverted Intuition in order to make other people comfortable. Ti and Ne are part of your genius you were born with to serve others. If they can’t handle your Ti and Ne, that is their problem, not yours. What is worse, if you do dial down your Ti and Ne, and that is your genius, you have nothing to offer others, and you push it into the shadow self, and it will just fight to surface later, often in destructive ways. Embrace your Ti and Ne, and embrace and integrate all aspects of yourself, and NEVER dim any aspect of yourself and your genius to fit in or make others comfortable.
Hi, Bethany here, INTJ. Definitely resonate with using “being true to myself” as a reason to not adapt and find what works – especially when it comes to making money. As in, “This job/business is incongruent with my values in some way/not my field”, when really I had secret fears of not performing well. I now find (since doing more personal development work) I have trouble with the EJ noble distraction but with a different flavour. I will putnlots of time into exercise or I “procrastibake”. I do it as a distraction from working on things that really leverage my effectiveness rather than to avoid looking inward as EJs might. I go running and skip the virtual business networking event, for example.
STOP caring what other people think about you. You can still be receptive to other people’s ideas, as long as they are not opinions about you.
Thanks guys for making so much sense. Your podcasts are so helpful and insightful. So much truth to what you say.
Hi! I am new to your podcasts and so far I am enjoying it. Actually this whole personality psychology thing is very new to me so it is now quite an adventure.
As I am also still not familiar with a lot of the technical terms used, such as for the many personality types, so a lot of the details just flew over my head. But I think I could still somewhat relate. And although I tested that I am an ENFP almost all the noble vices mentioned seemed to also have been my issue as well. 😐
I liked how you guys give examples of this phenomenon of us not doing what we actually should be doing but how people rather tend to get into something not so real, from simple tasks such as washing the dishes determinedly before assessing, to the very deep where the important fundamental questions of our life and existence seems to be set aside.
Don’t quite seem to understand why and how we come to do this… but I can see now how knowing that better would help myself and others to hack into our selves to be more true to have the real happiness at all times.
Hopefully I will be able better understand as I look for more answers. Thanks a lot!