The most common misconception about Introverts and Extraverts is their relationship to people. If you’re shy, it’s assumed you’re an Introvert. If you love to party, it’s assumed that you’re an Extravert. While there is a measure of truth to this, there is a far more accurate answer.
When you distill it down to its essence, the actual difference between Introverts and Extraverts is this: for Introverts, the inner world is the ‘real world’. For Extraverts, the external world is the ‘real world’. This is why Introverts will pause slightly before they speak, as if they’re making sure their words first resonant internally before they put it out ‘to the world’. Extraverts are the opposite – they’ll often speak while they’re thinking, as if hearing it outside of themselves helps them determine the value or truth of their own statement.
So, how does this impact their relationship with people? Not everything in the external world is going to resonate with the complex internal world of the Introvert. In fact, much of the world does not. Introverts are put in the position of constantly filtering information and calibrating it to what they know to be true internally. This can be quite taxing after a while, and time to themselves becomes a necessary reprieve.
The exception to this is when an Introvert makes space for another person in that ‘inner world’. This is most commonly seen when they mate or develop an extremely tight bond. That other person no longer is at odds with the ‘internal world’ as they have their own place there. It’s been reported by Introverts that they could actually spend all their time with that person, and usually feel lonely when that person is away.
On the other hand, Extraverts feel the most ‘at home’ when they are interacting with their environment. As a general rule, variety is stimulating and the more people they come in contact with, the more interesting it all is. Too much time to themselves leaves them bored and restless, and they need to interact with their environment to ‘recharge’. This doesn’t always require people – simply going for a walk, getting out-and-about or studying interesting things can be enough.
We all make places for special people inside of ourselves. As Extraverts are charged and fueled by the variety of their environment, if they spend too much time with a single person it can almost begin to feel like being alone. Intending no insult to their loved one, they can become restless and want to ‘get out into the world’ with or without that person accompanying them. Introverts, gun-shy from years of having to ‘calibrate’ to the outside world, can become bashful and protective of their energy. Extraverts, realizing other people are full of new information and energy can become extremely social to pursue that energy. But each person is unique, and how the two frames of mind exhibit themselves can be nuanced.
For example, Introverts can become ‘pontificators’ – people who take control of the conversation and its subject. Instead of calibrating to the outside world, they attempt to force the outside world to calibrate to their ‘inner world’. In these situations, doing all the talking avoids a back-and-forth conversation that quickly wears on the Introvert. An alternative example is the Extravert who is very aware of, and can fear, approval and disapproval of others. Since that is the ‘real world’, disapproval feels like an objective evaluation, and a resulting shyness can come over the Extravert that dearly wants to be social.
Each of us experience life differently, and we develop a variety of strategies to get us through life. When it comes down it, however, an Introvert is happiest when life is resonating with how they feel on the inside, and an Extravert is happiest when they can explore the outside world to their heart’s content.
There is an approximately 50/50 split in the population between Introverts and Extraverts.
Share:
Isabel Briggs Myers
How are "Sensors" and "Intuitives" Different?
33 comments
I’m a shy ENFP and don’t agree at all with this article. My type was administered professionally, and it came to the conclusion I’m ENFP because Ne is my dominant function.
Also, I don’t think people realize what a (very) mental function Ne is, it requires us to be in our heads A LOT making connections with ideas and coming up with ideas. Throw Fi on top of that as a secondary function, and you have an extrovert who is an “introvert” according to this article.
Hey, I think your site might be having browser compatibility issues.
When I look at your blog in Safari, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping.
I just wanted to give you a quick heads up!
Other then that, awesome blog!
Muy bueno, aun no estoy de alianza con todo.
Gracias por la aclaración, bss
I agree with you Antonia… this 70/25 statistic is false, the reason why they came out like this is simple, we introverts aren’t so easy to notice. I made some research my self and came to conclusion that Extraverts and Introverts don’t occupy the same space. Or putting it frankly the whole research made by that person was biased as he concentrated only on an extraverted enviroment, thus the statistic number,however if he added a typical introverted enviroment like facebook for example he could get the same stats as you did. This is because extraverts and introverts follow theire respective paths in life..meaning that an introvert personm might become a writer while an extravert will make a good salary man. The same goes with culture if you concentrate on Hollywood and Bollywood you mostly see extraverted culture, however if you’re a fan of anime than you’ll see the introverted culture, the same is true with most independent productions which are more introverted than extraverted…or putting it more clearly more artistic means of expression is the domain of introverts rather than extraverts who in theire work concentrate on showing bounbds and fast paced action.Also relationships are different for both Extraverts and introverts as you described extraverts need a lot of people around themelfs which ma cause a betrayal, while introverts are generall more loyal to theire partners, or are more willing to accept novel ways in theire relationship (thought not all of them, some introverts are hardcore fanatics of the current social model) Introverts are often these more concerned with theire own viosions, soul and idea’s while extraverts seek bounds and exciting new oppourtinities in the outside world. Althought these are only basic traits , if you look closefully it can sometimes be hard to tell whether the person is introverted or extraverted as both personalities mimick each other
Hey, James! Thanks for the comment.
The 75/25 is a common stat quoted for the split between Introverts and Extraverts, one that I quoted myself for over 5 years. However, as Camronn and I were profiling more and more people, the stat just didn’t hold up to our experience. Now, I’m as death-grippy as the next ENTP when it comes to researched stats, and very loathe to give them up simply in favor of personal experience, so it wasn’t a mere matter of saying, “Op, looks like they’re wrong. Better choose anecdote over research.” But I can’t really hold tight to stats that very much disagree with literally HUNDREDS of profiling sessions. So, we got the bottom of it.
The only study I could locate that comes down definitely on a 75/25 split is David Keirsey’s, and as a strong voice in the Myers-Briggs community, his stats have been repeated many times over. Looking at the CONTEXT of his study, however, it’s difficult to see his stats as being the last word. Keirsey’s research was predominately focused on High School students – the time period in your life where you’re by far the most social! While it’s interesting, it’s not exactly a ‘controlled’ case.
Looking further into the subject, we discovered there are some research stats that claim there are more Introverts than Extraverts by a 51/49, but most (with the exception of Keirsey) place it at a 50/50. This matches our experience – we profile literally hundreds of people a year, and the only dichotomy that is overwhelmingly represented is Sensors over Intuitives (unless you account for gender, which indicates a large Feeler preference among women).
Until we’re able to perform our own controlled statistics gathering research ourselves, I’m going to stick with the stats that match my personal observation (and don’t lean on High School students to be the tie-breaker), an approximately 50/50 demographic split.
-Antonia