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In this episode, Joel and Antonia talk about how we can manage life changes during a disruptive event like the current global pandemic.
In this podcast you’ll find:
- NLP: Pattern interrupt
- We are experiencing a considerable pattern interrupt right now
- It’s shifting people – inside and out
- How do we make changes in this pressure-cooker environment?
- “The macro mirrors the micro, and the micro mirrors the macro.”
- The changes in entire societies can mirror what is happening to the individual, and vice versa.
- Electing a narcissistic leader shouldn’t be surprising in a narcissistic society.
- Pattern interrupts cause us to stop and pay attention to what is happening on autopilot.
- The universe throws us these pattern interrupts all the time.
- Stuff is bubbling to the surface in people’s lives right now.
- “What actually matters to me?”
- Pattern interrupts change how you see things.
- The pandemic is interrupting our external systems, which forces us to analyze our internal systems.
- If you haven’t looked at the programming of your GPS in awhile, this can be very destabilizing.
- Once you start cutting out noise, other signals begin to get in.
- If your go-to distraction is no longer available to you, the thoughts you’ve been avoiding will start to get through.
- People are making major life choices right now in a time when it seems like the worst possible time.
- People are getting their fill of distractions.
- Action follows significant changes.
- It’s easy to quit your job when everyone is out of work because there is no requirement of action in a quarantine.
- Or maybe the quarantine is giving us our space to think through the decisions we need to make.
- “No matter what happens, it is to my benefit.”
- Sometimes we don’t see the benefit of a situation until long afterward.
- This situation is pretty horrifying, but it can be to our benefit.
- Less anxiety. More grace. More space.
- Make peace with the changes.
- Self-care isn’t always a glass of wine with a bubble bath.
- Self-nourishment implies more depth.
- It’s our responsibility to own our triggers.
- Be responsible for your emotions.
- Don’t hand yourself over to your triggers.
- Your emotions aren’t the only show in town.
- 20 tokens per week. Each token represents 30 minutes on a device.
- They can’t be hoarded.
- No more than 2 hours on a weekday and 4 hours on weekends.
- They can turn in the tokens for money at the end of the week.
- This is happening for us, not to us.
- “If it’s to be, it’s up to me.”
- It’s time to be an adult.
- You are the decision point in your life.
- It is seductive to believe somebody else has got this.
- YOU are the person who has this. YOU overcome the obstacles.
- This is the basis for self-esteem.
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13 comments
Most people in the world will be POORER, not wealthier, and that is by design, by the criminal psychopaths who control all of the world’s systems, and who planned this fake pandemic in the first place to bankrupt all of the world’s people and force them into a new economic system of total control and surveillance. No SARS COV-2 virus was ever isolated, it does not exist. Several people in various countries did Freedom of Information inquiries asking for proof of isolation of the SARS COV-2 virus, and every government responded that it was never isolated.
The criminal psychopaths who rule the world believe that we DON’T matter, and are doing everything they can to covertly murder all of us, so they can have the Earth and its resources to themselves and their families. The Georgia Guidestones in the USA say that they plan to reduce the human population of the world to under 500 million people.
I think it is really interesting that Antonia and Joel talk about how the quarantine has been a good time for them to work on their inferior introverted sensing process for themselves and their family. That is an awesome outlook and a perfect process for the situation. My 3 year old is harmony and I can really see its importance more strongly and would like to work on it, but after 10+ months in isolation living alone in a new town and job where I don’t know anyone and can’t meet anyone if I am going to be responsible, I am looking for ideas of how I can bring more connection into my life under the current circumstances. Zoom happy hours, large family zoom calla and most of the other social media/IT solutions tend to be more extrovert oriented. I don’t mind participating in them but listening to a bunch of other people talking isn’t bringing the personal connections I am craving.
Hi Guys
I am INFP and I am glad for this podcast. Thank you. Something that Joel said – there is no parent to take care of us during this pandemic. I felt the same way. There was no mother figure to comfort me with this as I have realised everyone is going through similar situations. I have no right to complain either.
I can resonate with you both and the challenges of having and supporting kids through a pandemic. I have 3 of my own and I am a single parent.
Alot of emotions have come to the surface..Some unresolved traumas which I had tucked away. One trauma was the existential fear of death when at one point I believed I was in the high risk category. Another trauma thats came up was the fact I was mirroring and adopting the strict authoritarian role of my own mother!
I felt I should be doing more even although I was exhausted balancing trying to be emotionally and pysically available for my kids. There was also the extra challenge of homeschooling the kids and hating myself because I felt I didnt have the skills to teach my own kids.
One of the prominent emotions I felt was anger. Anger at everthing, myself, others, work, government ect.the entire situation felt like grief response.
On reflection I have realised that the social structures in my life have fell away. School, childcare and my work, the things that I had been relying on, taking for granted and distracting me fell away.
I work as a counsellor and thought to hell with the profession I have been so passionate about for 7 years. My children are what matter and my own mental health was in jeopardy. I wasnt in a position to create a safe space for my clients either.
Fast forwad 7 weeks, I have now had my rest, and self care. My energy and concentration is coming back. My passion for my career is slowly returning.
I feel now that I have navigated through the dark corners of myself. I have a greater compassion for my mother who I had a strained relatonship with when she was alive.
I can also take this pain and turn it around and see that I have resilience in myself to cope with unexpected situations. I can also use my knowledge of my own emotions to help treat others in practice. This will increase my empathy to walk alongside clients navigating their own pain.
And a final note..through homeschooling I have taken an unusual keen interest in how kids learn…maybe this is a new career path for me or one that can integrate into my current career.
Thank you
Elaine
Yep, I am in the “make giant life change in the middle of a pandemic” category. In my case it was a half-planned/half-accident, and half good/half bad. I’ve been wanting to make a career change for a year, and have pronounced “I’m moving” or “I’m quitting my job” twice in that time, but then delayed it for X date each time. And then just when I finally had an actual, practical, solid plan for easing into the change, corona happened, and I lost my job. So now I’m forced to make the change and I am SO excited about it, as unfortunate as the whole situation is anyways.
I’m an INTP so Exploration is THE BEST but hard to jump start. I always say that I like being told what to do to move towards the future, like being part of a system like school that takes you through a process- hand holding, really. School is what spurred the last big change in my life, because I had to do internships that were way out of my comfort zone, triggering massive growth. So in one way, the pandemic is acting like that system for me now, forcing me to do something that makes me uncomfortable that will ultimately lead to good things.
On the flip side, I finally now have a way to describe the emotional outbursts caused by constant triggering… when I was working in the office I couldn’t actually EXPRESS the outburst… it’s a lot easier now that I work from home, so… yeah… I’m totally a toddler and that needs to stop haha.
I am an INTJ and everything you wrote in this comment resonated with me very deeply. While I listened to this podcast and picked out many useful, insightful gems, something entirely different struck me — something I don’t know if Joel and Antonia fully intended it. An extrovert’s experience of the pandemic and the required lockdown is going to be fundamentally different from an introvert’s experience because of the fundamental differences in what an extrovert’s mind craves vs what an introvert craves. I respect their experiences very much, but mine are quite different.
For me, the moment I began making all of the necessary adjustments and recalibrations to get myself and my family set up for doing the best we can, safely, through this horrible period of time, I was able to tap into my innate strengths as an INTJ. Once their transition settled into a new normal for them, I knew I could FINALLY relax into who I really am deep down inside and do what I am best at, and start becoming what I can really become. I don’t need to pretend that I am someone else or play by rules that don’t favor me. If anything, the current rules of life right now greatly favor my style of happiness and my road to career success.
Right from the start I knew that the pandemic, the social distancing, the global shutdowns and societies pulling back would give me space to make major changes in my career and lifestyle— changes that I deeply desired. And all of this is despite the fact that this situation Is horrible and, for many, completely disrupting if not absolute terrifying.
I too have worried that once everything goes back to “normal,” I’ll be forced back into a system that taxes my senses, my body, and my mind but … to be honest, I am absolutely certain that when the future new normal eventually comes it won’t be the same as the old normal.
I think the more that Intuitive Introverts (especially INTJs) set up systems NOW that work incredibly well for them and those around them, they more their ability to thrive will be evident to people who, frankly, are often very uncomfortable with what works for intuitive introvert. We are in a position to rewrite the rules of work, success, families, communities, and so forth. The foundations for the new normal starts getting built right now, not a couple of years from now when this is all over. to the best of my ability I am already planning on making it happen.